Verbal Jokes

I really wish I could tell a good joke to make everyone laugh out loud. I remember most of the joke until the punch line then 'screw' it up every time. About the only one I can think of is an old Irish joke which has passed around forever and I think I have told it a dozen times, so for posterity sake I'll tell it one more time. "There were two Irish men who worked at the torpedo station in Newport, R.I. back in the forties. They were best buddies and spent every free moment at the Briar & Brew bar for a pint before going home for the day. It was a habit they refused to break. One morning 'Paddy' didn't show up to catch the ferryboat to the island so 'Mick' went on but was uncomfortable for the day. He thought of nothing but his friend all day. When work was over he went to Paddy's house and Paddy's wife was happy to see him, saying, "Mick, I'm so glad you are here. Paddy had a heart attack in the middle of the night and we had the priest in for the last rites. He will be so glad to see you, go on up and cheer him up." Mick went up and spent an hour cheering his friend up. As he stood up to leave, he bumped his head on the slanted ceiling and said, " How the hell are they going to get a coffin out of here." I think I've heard this joke told in as many dialects.

Yesterday our cartoon Maxine said, "It's not a leap year, but feel free to take a flying one anyway." And the piece of resistance was the one that came in on an e-mail with the title
"Creation or Evolution?" A little girl asked her mother "How did the human race appear?" Mother answered: "God made Adam and Eve and they had children and all of mankind was made. The little girl asked her father the same question and he said, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved." The little girl was confused so she went back to her mother and said, "you told me God made us and Dad said we came from monkeys." Her mother smiled and said, "Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

So today, when you are out and about and sit down with a friend or two, start a joke fest and laugh out loud. You will be amazed at how good you will feel. All you need is a good memory to remember the punch line. Make today a fun one after all it is hump day and the weekend looms ahead.